The formula is simple.
Pair a simple, declarative sentence in its own paragraph with a longer, more detailed paragraph to follow. The two paragraphs set against each other will balance the other’s flavors out nicely.
Practice it mercilessly in workshop and use sparingly in finished work.
As you can see from this blog post, an entire essay or article that’s filled with long-short paragraph variations is going to tire, frustrate, and bore readers easily. It will also become predictable, just like predicting that LeBron James is going to score 20 points in a game. The good news, however, is that once you introduce the trick, you can invite readers to look for it across their reading.
Mentor texts used: An article about Alec Baldwin’s Donald Trump impersonation from The New York Times and a chapter from The Nix by Nathan Hill (hardcover pgs. 482-492) Note: read over these mentor texts before using to see if they are appropriate for your students.
Teaching this technique – version A:
- Invite students to freewrite off of each of these starting sentences from these mentors: “It takes seven minutes” or “Today was the day he would quit Elfscape.”
- Have students share their work.
- Reveal first two paragraphs of the Times article and page 482 from The Nix. (Note: the vocabulary on this page of The Nix is tough, so I would suggest using it as an example of the technique only.)
- Identify ideal locations for this technique (leads, beginnings of chapters and sections.)
- Practice this technique in a freewrite or on a piece in progress.
Teaching this technique – version B:
- Have students read the New York Times article and flash-skim the chapter from The Nix. Unless you want students to read a sentence that extends for ten pages…
- Ask students about how and why these two authors decided to begin paragraph 1 simply and laden paragraph 2 with all the details. Why might an author decide to describe a character’s decision to stop playing an online role playing game with zero periods? Why might the Times author give us excruciating detail about Alec Baldwin’s Trump makeup? To what extent are these “characters” portrayed similar? Or are the purposes here different?
- Invite students to “hack” their own writing or another expository piece (e.g. a history or science textbook) to mimic the long-short style. Is this an improvement? Is the writing worse? Why or why not?
Amy Estersohn teaches middle school English in New York. She has never played an online role playing game and only pretends to know how to play paper and dice role playing games, so reading The Nix wasn’t easy. Follow her on Twitter at @HMX_MsE.
What are you thinking?